#at 9pm

[thebroccolination]

So like. People have had contact with people in other cultures and locations for most if not all of human history. But I was just thinking about yesterday when I told someone I’m saving up to visit Thailand so I can see my favorite Thai actors.

It’s just wild to me how recently in living memory I would have had no way of knowing these people even exist, let alone have the easy access to consistent, generally accurate translations that give me an understanding of who they are.

I was a rarity in university for following Japanese pop groups.

It’s just so cool to have this level of connection because of the internet. Last summer, I visited a bridge in Bangkok that made me cry because it was featured in a show that made me happy while I was stuck indoors by myself during a global pandemic.

The world is on fire, but we keep finding ways to connect to each other, and I think it’s comforting sometimes to remember how many of us are just trying to reach someone’s hand, even across oceans and languages.

[starbuck]

i think. i am going to take a day off work

[goomygirllover]

this is the first time I see Amy waking up earlier than me...

I always wake up at 7am and she tends to get out of bed around 8, 9, sometimes even 1pm

but today she was wide awake in the backyard

good to see she's improving a bit

[1969chevycamaro]

I'm doing my part.

Now more than ever we need to make Tumblr unmarketable, do NOT invite the government into this space.

[stealingpotatoes]

My apologies, Lady Normal. But where does you Eunuch come from?

[fiona-fififi]

...

[theasylumchild]

Gotta get up at 4:45 tomorrow to go volunteer. Only doing it to get guaranteed entry for the marathon next year. Not looking forward to having to take my dog on her multi hour walk after working 5 hours, but we’ll survive 💪

[sunlit-mess]

yea

[hoodedjelly]

Motivated to sleep

[mega-ether]

I lost my job tonight pretty suddenly so if by some miracle any of you know of a good remote job, please message me.

[benevolenterrancy]

found the perfect pair of wangxian night shirts while I was out and about today

[bookwyrminspiration]

Quil can we be mutuals? I will gladly squeeze you and spin you around, because that is always fun (unless you don’t want me to in that case you get a high five).

Also, expect a very long ask from me in the near future. I am giving you a summary of Ninjago but I made it stupidly complicated

-⚙️

Absolutely! I'd love to be squeezed and spun around, perhaps while blasting some silly music!! I think I might be a little bit touch starved, it happens quite frequently and then I am full of Yearning and huge crushing hugs sound like the best thing in the world

I will keep my eyes figuratively peeled for that long ask! I'd forgotten Ninjago even existed until right this moment, but apparently I am about to become an expert!

[lost-in-wond3rland]

Being on tumblr really just feels like being adrift in the middle of the ocean

It really does feel like no one else is on this hell site which is kind of great because I never feel bad about shit posting lol I don't think I've done anything BUT shit post about my current hyper fixations in YEARS lol (case and point, me re-blogging a bunch of red white and royal blue posts the other day because I finished reading the book and would like the movie now please-)

I forgot I used to write on here sometimes, or that I even could. Was it ever anything substantial? Nah. Just musings of a usually v depressed and out of wack teenager.

I am now a slightly less depressed out of wack adult lmao

All this to say, read at your own whim or risk or whatever. It's the internet dude, do what you want.

I'm starting grad school in a little over a month, and I know people talk about how daunting that is all the time. But what I haven't really seen is people talking about going into a program that has n o t h i n g to do with your BA. I'm essentially doing a bit of a 180 with my studies, and where everyone else has loads of experience, and knowledge, and is just so stupid fucking smart, I...

Well, that's just it, isn't it? The trail off. The ... .

Not to say (among other things) that I'm not "smart" per-say. I'm not dumb, I know that. But these people? Mannnnn, you guys should hear and see some of these people. It is nothing short of terrifying.

I've been feeling very Elle Woods in her "coming here was a mistake" era lately. But when I try to explain that, it's usually the same "don't get intimated!" "you're all just starting!" "you're going to be fine!" etceteras etceteras. Not necessarily untrue, but not necessarily true either.

I'm going into a program where I am leaps and bounds behind literally everyone. People older than me, people younger than me, doesn't matter. And it feels like as hard as I work, I'm always missing something. Always 10, 15, 20, 100 steps behind everyone else. We just had a month of an online intensive orientation where we were interacting, and talking on discussion boards, and doing homework... And somehow, I still cant get everything fully right. Down to choosing the wrong kind of photo to go on my fucking introduction slide. Like come on! Seriously!? I can't even get that right? It's...

Yeah. It's.

So here I am, sitting on my bed, with my smart lights set to purple, in a too big Spider-Man cardigan, with a Taylor Swift lofi playlist going on youtube, contemplating yet again how the fuck I got here.

I made the joke to my mom that I was just the diversity pick. She didn't find that nearly as funny as I did. I digress.

We're... working on it. Kind of, at least. Pretending to, more accurately.

I just feel... like I'm in a constant state of having to prove myself, because nothing is ever enough. Nothing has ever been enough. I have worked so hard to the point where I have been on the brink of passing out before and even that still was not fucking enough.

Enough for who? For me? For my parents? For the metaphorical "them"? For anyone? I don't know. All of the above?

For that, I have no concrete answer and yet piles and piles and piles of evidence showing that nothing has in fact ever been enough.

I'm complaining too much, aren't I? I know it's not. World ending. There are bigger things. "People are dying Kim!" I know (also no, my name is not Kim, please understand the reference I'm begging lol).

Just some casual almost 9pm thoughts I guess.

I have work tomorrow, had the day off today. I started a new job and of course that happened at the same time as the online intensive so maybe that exasperated all these feelings since I really have had not a goddamn clue as to what has been happening for almost a month now but. I digress. But the job is going pretty okay. Slowly, I've been able to start to figure that out. And I somehow made it to the Eras Tour this weekend which was mind meltingly amazing. So I shouldn't complain. I really don't have anything to complain about at all.

And yet.

And yet.

And yet.

Well, I'm gonna fuck off and read some fanfic now. If for whatever reason someone tortured themselves and made it to the end, whats your fic poison of choice lately? I've been reading loads of Irondad & Spiderson fics. Give me Peter "I take care of everyone but don't know how to take care of myself because I think I'm fine" Parker and Tony "100% has a heart and just wants his idiot pseudo son to realize it's okay for people to help you" Stark all day.

...does that reveal too much? Eh. It's fine, I'm fine.

-Seven

07.24.2023

[chmieldog]

is it evil to repost my favorite stolkiens from 2023 just because i miss them

[ethosiab]

just two guys, cursed by a god to be eternally bound by their souls

One of the main contributers to Joel and Etho's dynamic in this AU is the supposed familiarity (or lack thereof) each of them has with their curses and the soul god. Etho first picked up that stupid dagger over a decade before the story begins, he's been living with it for a large part of his life. After feeling forced to leave his family because of the bloodlust, and travelling for years trying desperately to find a way to break the curse or get rid of the dagger, Etho's jaded. He's... given up, and is trying to be content with the quiet life he's built in this tiny island village. He's got friends! A friend! The bloodlust has been pretty quiet! The soul god is probably busy doing other things, pestering other victims. He's scared of upsetting this small sanctuary he's built, even if that upset may lead him back to his home and his family.

Then along comes Joel, freshly cursed, shipwrecked, and stubborn as fuck. Joel's got a loyal crew to get back to, a wife, people he's promised to protect. He may not have had much, but he had them, and he'll do anything to get back (Etho thought he'd do the same, once, but then again, he ran away willingly). And in some twisted move on the soul god's part, they're tied together! Feel everything the other does, can't get much more than half a kilometre away from the other before they double over in pain on the verge of death.

Joel doesn't understand Etho yet, and Etho doesn't want Joel to understand him. Neither of them can get what they want without sacrificing the other's needs. It's almost like some higher power orchestrated this whole thing in an attempt to cause drama!

In the end, Etho's the one dragged along on adventure to reunite with Grian, Jimmy, and Lizzie. If he's secretly hoping Joel's quest will bring him closer to getting back to Cleo, Bdubs, and Beef, that's his business.

[themetalhiro]